The course was actually Session Five of the program: "Why And How Do I Pray?". I was ready for Session Four, which would have been "How Can We Have Faith?", but due to some scheduling difficulty with the weekend retreat, and the natural flow of the lectures themselves, the Church had to reorganize the actual delivery of the sessions. The sessions themselves are as follows:
- Is There More To Life Than This?
- Who Is Jesus?
- Why Did Jesus Die?
- How Can We Have Faith?
- Why And How Do I Pray?
- Why And How Should I Read The Bible?
- How Does God Guide Us?
- Who Is The Holy Spirit?
- What Does The Holy Spirit Do?
- How Can I Be Filled With The Spirit?
- How Can I Resist Evil?
- Why And How Should I Tell Others?
- Does God Heal Today?
- What About The Church?
- How Can I Make The Most Of The Rest Of My Life?
We started the evening as before, with a meal. This time, they served me salmon (everyone else had a pork dish, I think). Again, as before, it was great - and they went out of their way to make sure my flexatarian dietary needs were met. There was no real conversation about tonight's topic around the dinner table, as it was mostly chit-chat about Saskatchewan farmers and who had lived where ... it seems everyone has either lived or knows someone from Outlook, SK. We had two men at our table from the Ressurection House, and Harry wasn't there this evening - so I was on my own.
After dinner, we went into the sanctuary and, after a joke, sung two modern hymns (in my opinion, not very catchy, but everybody seemed to know the words). After the hymns, the pre-recorded lecture from Nicky Gumbel started. The lecture itself lasted about fifty minutes, and was all about prayer - how to do it, when to do it, and why to do it. For me, the progression of the course itself was quite fast. It seemed to glance upon many of the contentious issues, and assume that you had already bought their arguments - so it was time to move on. The more I see of the lectures, the more the progression seems obvious. In sales jargon, we would call it the "assumptive close".
After the lectures we went back to the auditorium for dessert and discussion. The questions John had for us tonight were:
- Do you pray? If so, why?
- How do you know God answered a particular prayer and that it wasn’t just coincidence?
- When you pray, are you 100% certain that your prayers will be answered? If yes, why? If no, why?
- When you do pray, what do you usually pray for? Do you pray for what you want or what you need? What does that say about your life?
- If God knows everything you need, then why do you pray?
- Can you think of a time or know of an incident where prayer really did change circumstances?
Ron (at our table) told the story of his brother, who was killed in a car accident just after Christmas 2010, not even two months ago. He was obviously distressed when talking about it, as the wound is still fresh. He is firm in his belief that he will see his brother again when he, himself, dies. That belief gives him, and his brothers widow, solace. They do not know why he died, but are confident that a bigger plan is at work here. If you're interested in seeing how someone with a very deep belief copes with this kind of grief (his widow now has four children to raise), her blog is here. I talked to Ron briefly after the session, and I commented to him about how I've had people close to me die as well, and that writing about it - even if only in a journal that nobody will ever read - is cathartic. Writing in a blog is courageous.
I have some comments to make about my friend John, and the whole reason I went to Alpha (at his urging). John has made the comment in the past that "Funny how we can share about a good meal we had, but we can't share about the single greatest event in a person's life.". He is clearly passionate about this, and he's reorganized his priorities to make this the most important thing he can do (at least that's how I see it). It is not in conflict with his situation at all - in fact it is complementary in most ways (except for the "Got Jesus" shirt John - I've been looking for a "Got Darwin" shirt for myself, but have yet to find one ... Atheists are just not that well organized). As for morality, living a respectful life, decency or having empathy - I'm not convinced that he or his brethren have any clear advantage to me. They will say that they have a clear pathway to God, but I choose not to believe in that path or that god. For every reason they have for believing, I have one for not. They believe their reasons are more compelling, I believe mine are. And never the twain shall meet. They do have one up on me, though; they firmly believe that this is not all there is - and that there is a bigger plan and a better place.
John is respectful of my opinions to the point where he defends my right to have them ... we had a conversation last night where my beliefs were held in "disbelief" by one of the men, and John, to his credit, said that "I was perfectly capable of explaining my position". Thanks, Johnny.
I've said this before and I'll say it again; I'm not going to change what the Church members think, and they're not going to change what I think. The motives for going to Alpha in the first place was to try and find some insight into what these folks actually believe. In my short time there I understand that their faith/belief is unconditional, that they believe God plays an active role in their lives, and can explain away anything and everything - mostly by trusting that an entity much bigger than us knows and cares about us, and will always do things in our best long term interests. I guess I'm more comfortable in my position saying "I just don't know - and maybe, probably, I'll never know".
We never got into the more interesting things, and by the looks of the course we never would. Things like evolution, homosexuality, the role of women, the hypocrisy of some Christian leaders, etc. I would throw down this challenge, though. If anyone would like to talk about this in a non-judgmental way, count me in. The one thing I have taken away from all of this is that I really like the opportunity to talk and debate this taboo topic, knowing that I can walk away and (I hope) leave nobody feeling hurt.
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