Sunday, May 5, 2013

Why?

 Trey Ratcliff via Compfight

Over the last several weeks (OK - several years) people have looked at Laura and me and wondered what was going on .... Some of the things we do seem strange when compared to the "normal" middle aged, middle class, white couple living a comfortable life in the Western world.

So to save Laura time and embarrassment (nobody ever asks me - they think it's normal for me), I'll write it all down here. Why?

It's Not Just Me

Although I've been accused of having a strong will, and I will admit that I get my way most of the time (given sufficient time and pressure - kind of like a diamond), there are really two of us involved in these decisions.

Actually, as Kathryn has gotten older, she has become quite the source of influence as well. Our normal is Kathryn's boring. David is a bit more conservative (at least for now).

Laura and I hash these major life moves back and forth for months before we finally take a leap. I've often told her that "I could live in a box under a bridge" - so the final decision is always hers.

Why Now?

So the latest "experiment" in living is something I've been interested in for a long, long time. Smaller spaces. My real preference would be to live on boat, but I can see that's really impractical at this point (I now get seasick after the stroke). I have been trying to convince Laura of a "Tiny House" for a decade or more now, and she never caved, so this is the next best thing.

Although we'll likely never have all the conveniences we have today right at our fingertips (3 bedrooms, 2 car garage, walk to the grocery store, walk to the park, etc..), what we don't have is flexibility.

I think Laura and I agree that having all that cash tied up in a home ties you to a location and a lifestyle. We want the ability to change without trying too hard. It would also be nice to have the tied up money working for us as well - we got out of the house less than what we put in six years ago. We've made money on some of the homes we've owned before - but I think the days of the house funding your retirement are gone.

And now both kids (OK - not kids, adults) are overseas, maybe for the long term. The reason for having a "home base" is gone.

The Biggest Reason

OK - now the biggest reason.

For me especially, life is too short to dick around living it conventionally. I want to try a bit of everything.

We were lucky enough to be born white, wealthy (by world standards), English speakers and in North America. If you're able, why not try living in a house boat, cycling South America, camping in Australia, taking a 12 month road trip, couch surfing to Japan, take in Burning Man, or motorcycle the length of Africa?

I guess you could still do all these things and have a home, but it would be harder. They all take cash, and most of us don't have enough to try anything and everything.

We've lost close friends (Mike, Jack) who never had the chance to do these things. I don't even know that they wanted to do these things - but they're gone, so we'll never know. I do want to try other things, and have been fortunate enough to have a second (third?) chance at them.

Stuff is Just Stuff

At the end of the day, we're tied to all our stuff. Much of this recent "project" is to get rid of as much "stuff" as we can. It actually starts to feel good when you can either

  • sell the stuff to someone who really wants/likes it (I'm a Craigslist superuser)
  • give it away to someone who really needs it - the couple who bought our house could barely afford it, so they're grateful for everything we can leave behind

The less stuff you have, the more flexible you can be - and we want to be really flexible (even though Laura made us rent a small storage locker - but my bet is it will disappear in the next year).

Our First Decision - Economic or Social?

When we first decided to list the house and move, we thought that downtown was our destination. And up until the last month or so it was. But when an actual offer came in on the house, we had a decision to make:

  • make a bit more money and move closer to high paying jobs (for Laura)
  • stay in Port Coquitlam where most of our friends are (Sunday Diack dinners, sushi night, beer on a driveway at Plymouth Crescent, almost daily bike rides with the old farts)

Staying won out - it was never really a contest. So we reduce our costs, get some better return on the house funds, do some travel, and enjoy a smaller footprint.

The Downside

There is a downside to this new lifestyle. We're moving from near 1500 square feet and a two car garage with street parking, to 500 square feet with one outside parking spot. So the most we can entertain is two people at a time. So we have to come to you, not you to us. Did I say downside?

The Adventure

So now it's time to start another adventure.

Although Mike and Jack have memorable epitaphs, I know neither of them wanted them. We have a chance to write our own - so we're writing.

2 comments:

Marian Leighton said...

Mary sent me the link to your blog. I have read it with interest. It immediately made me think about many things in our own lives. Like you, a major health hurdle hit our lives. Not sure for us what the impact will be and we are not quite ready to sell our big house and ridiculously large garden but I get it totally. We had a house half the size for all our years in Saudi when we had 3 kids. But then, unlike you and Laura, we still have a couple of adult kids plus a girlfriend still living here and we are still storing their "valuables." But I do have glimpses in my mind of what life without so many responsibilities would be like. You have probably heard too that Dick is about to embark on a sailing journey but that may be more like what you are contemplating though not by boat with the seasickness issue! I look forward to more blog posts. And time to update my own blog for that matter. :) Marian Leighton

Deb said...

I have never asked why, and totally get why you're doing this! However I have had some trouble getting it across to others, so thanks for the post and the clarity........good luck, I think it's wonderful and look forward to hearing all about this new adventure!