Third Time's a Charm

I migrated to Microsoft Outlook in the early days. It took me three tries to get there, though. There were all these new ideas to wrap my head around - different ways of doing things, different ways of handling events, different ways of handling email.

I went back-and-forth between the new and exciting Outlook (this must have been around 1995) and whatever I was using before  (it's lost in the dustbin of my mind so I can't even remember what it was - probably a DayTimer).

The point of this is that I would go back and forth several times before it finally stuck, and was able to move forward with the new platform. This caused me to waste all kinds of time as I would completely move over to the new system, only to move back to the old one when I discovered I couldn't do something (or thought I couldn't do something).

This time it's Inbox by Google. I was an early adopter of GMail, so I naturally started to use Google Tasks and Google Calendar as well. Integrating these on a desktop/laptop was easy, but getting them to work as one on a Smartphone never happened. The closest I got was an app that would do email (GMail), and another one that would manage tasks and calendar (CalenGoo). (The Desktop was never an issue with any platform.)

I've tried to migrate to Inbox (Google makes it pretty easy) three different times now, but kept going back to the old familiar applications.  I've also tried several stand-alone programs that handle tasks or calendar, but they didn't make life any easier.

But this time I think it's sticking. I was going to move back to the Calengoo/GMail system a couple of weeks ago, but it was now lacking some stuff I had started to rely on:

• Reminders - which are like tasks
• Snooze - the ability to snooze emails and reminders and have them delivered to you later
• Pin - makes sure important emails or reminders are always there, staring you in the face

I couldn't replace any of this with the old system (without adding a bunch of new, third party programs). I even tried Microsoft Outlook for Android - which does a very nice job of integrating Email, Contacts and Calendar - but it lacks accommodation for Reminders - which is now pretty huge to me.

Google says it's going to continue investing in this platform - and they say it's the future of email. It's not perfect (the Calendar needs integration), but it's getting there. For now, I'm stuck with the new platform, and that's OK.

If you're GMail centric give it a shot - but stick with it for a couple of weeks to see if it adheres.

It's Just Emotion That's Taken Me Over

The pseudobulbar affect, or emotional lability, affects a significant percentage of MS, ALS, traumatic brain injury, stroke, and several other survivors. You probably know someone with this affliction, and didn't really know what it was.

Emotional lability is when the person's ability to control their emotions - mostly laughing and crying - are limited or non existent. They might laugh at something that's only marginally funny or cry at something that might cause you to sigh. The outburst can often be inappropriate - laughing at something that's really sad or crying at something that's obviously funny or happy. Try as they might, those with emotional lability cannot control this.

It's not physically debilitating, but you can imagine where it can cause real trouble. If it's severe enough, it puts a damper on almost any social situation.

Which brings us to me. I have this as a result of the stroke. Initially it was completely uncontrollable and uncomfortable. As the years go by, I found it happens less and less in public, but still happens often when I'm by myself or with close family. Brother Rob often kids me about it.

For the most part when we're out in social situations it seems to be pretty repressed. There might be the odd laugh, but it doesn't come across as really awkward. When something is really funny, though, I can't contain myself. But I never could.

All the "control" I have is subconscious. There's nothing I can consciously do to try and control it (it's like you trying to control what makes you sad). And, as I said, it seems to be getting better with time .

Yesterday I had another chance to make a short speech (my story) at a Heart and Stroke Canvasser Rally. I'd done something similar this summer at a H&S Golf Tournament.

I'm completely confident before I speak, as I've done this kind of thing (speak to large groups of strangers) for most of my working life.

But when it comes time to walk up to the podium, I'm a ridiculous bundle of nerves - shaking and speaking like I'm terrified. Fortunately, Gillian (the local manager at H&S) explained what's going on after I finished talking. Everybody was very understanding.

Regardless of who you are, there are always "butterfles" in your stomach before you speak in public. They might be very small, or very big, but they're there. My best approximation of this is that I have the same thing - only amplified 10X.

I'm hoping to recover from this the same way I've recovered from the rest of my stroke. Most have diminished with repetition - months and years of repetition.

So I'm grateful for the opportunity to speak, and hope to be asked again. Speaking in this most forgiving of environments (Heart and Stroke) is wonderful - I get to continue to try, while explaining one of the awkward after affects of brain trauma.